Archive for the ‘Funny Stuff!’ Category

Forget Doomsday, it’s New Years Eve!

Saturday, December 31st, 2011

Resolutions in the office, sans the snow.

THE WORLD IS GOING TO E……ahh, we’re kidding. The world isn’t going to end. If it does, from what 2012 has taught us, let’s all fly to Australia. Kangaroos can’t get hurt, right?

After much rejoicing from the new collection of entertainment I’ve accumulated over the holiday season, I’ve come back to breathe a little, and to send out thanks.

But it isn’t to those that have given me Christmas presents (they’ve already been thanked). It’s to thank you. Yeah, you. :)

Not to say my friends who have somehow bought me certain games and DVDs I’ve been wishing I’d get (quite visually on my social media), and somehow knew what I wanted aren’t to thank. But they are just a minute piece of the worldly support we have at CD WOW!.

Our gratitude for the continued support during the year can’t be expressed enough. There has been some amazing entertainment out there this year, and we’ve loved sharing moments (good and bad) with you all.

Sappy, I know. But it’s worth letting you all know that it’s your amazing support that has kept us music, video and gaming fans hard at work. I know not all our staff falls under the same categories for film genres and music choice, but that’s necessary. Who wants to only listen to what I like? I know one person, but that guy’s stubborn.

And with the kick-off of WOW’D this year, B’s been giving us another way to reach out to you to talk about the newest things coming out. She’s done an amazing job so far, as of course you’ll agree, and we’re looking forward to next year.

I do see a lot of great things ahead of us for 2012. As negative some things may come out of Doogs’ snout, it’s all from love of good entertainment. It’s our business to know what’s best to offer you. That’s why you’ll be able to order in items you’ve never seen on shelves.

No longer do we have to succumb to the woes of retail shop prices, because our store is online. If we feel like renovating, it doesn’t take a team of builders, but our IT team. If walls fall apart in our office, then I feel those builders will come in handy.

And this is where I thank you once again for supporting us through the year. We know our European and UK customers have faced a nervous financial situation, and our Australasian customers have been facing their own daily troubles, but what’s more comforting than sitting down with friends with your newly owned DVD box set, right?

Sorry, I’ve just watched Lord of the Rings trilogy on Blu-ray with friends. I don’t personally have a working Blu-ray (my PS3 is going through it’s monthly brain freeze), but a friend does, hence my pre-Christmas order came in quite handy.

From all of us here at CD WOW!, we wish you an amazing new year, and hope that none of your 2012 resolutions start with buying less TV show box sets. I think all that gym time’s getting in the way, in my opinion.

We’ll see you next year (tomorrow).


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Ride the Prime

Thursday, December 1st, 2011

Giddy up!

Amusement parks around the world base most of their rides around films.

Back from the days where the best place in the world to be was Disneyland, the park was filled with characters recognisable from almost every Disney cartoon and film you could remember.

There was Dumbo the Flying Elephant, Splash Mountain, the Indiana Jones Adventure, Star Tours, Pirates of the Caribbean (which funnily enough was a ride-to-movie reversal) and Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.

As time went on, Universal Studios popped up with rides like Jurassic Park, Jaws, King Kong, and Terminator 2.

So what’s next on this list? This weekend at Universal Studios Singapore, known for having the Battlestar Galactica ride (Which is awesome), will now be home to Transformers: The Ride.

It seems a perfect fit, considering amusement park rides are supposed to be loud, energetic, and throw your senses around like jellybeans in a jar.

What movie should be next in line for a ride? I have a few:

Pride and Prejudice -- Intense tea-drinking while shouting things at total strangers.
Forrest Gump -- Sit on a bench and hear 2 1/2 hours of stories.
The Hangover -- You’ll wish it was over before it even began.
Total Recall -- You won’t be the same once you walk out.
The Fly -- You DEFINITELY won’t be the same once you walk out.


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Rocky: The Musical – It’s happening

Thursday, November 24th, 2011

Hitting the high note.

Musicals as of late have garnered plenty of attention lately, whether good or bad. U2 tried to give Spiderman the Edge, South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone championed Broadway with their own show The Book of Mormon.

The classics such as Oklahoma, Into the Woods and Cats were all great leaders in what to expect for a musical. Of course nowadays there are plenty of musical films to accompany the same style (Moulin Rouge, Across the Universe).

It seems strange then to take a story that was fantastic in its original state to another format.

I loved Rocky. It had that feel-good-because-of-training montage that made me feel incredibly lacking in gym attendance, some killer tunes that I can never get out once they’re in, and of course the Balboa voice.

Now imagine the film as a musical. Sounds funny, right?

Well Sylvester Stallone’s got a plan. He’s going to bring Rocky to the stage. As a musical.

Now before you get all excited at how awesome that sounds (for the wrong reasons), he’s just producing it. But he is passionate about the story in Rocky, in particular the love story.

World boxing champs Wladimir and Vitali Klitschko are helping develop the play, and the Tony-winning writer Thomas Meehan will script the show. Expected to be out in Hamburg for German audiences November 2012, the sport of dancing around your opponent could work in some strange, yet oh-so-appealing way.

Until it comes out, have a watch at someone else’s attempt:


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That’s not how it should’ve ended

Monday, September 12th, 2011

"Aaand scene...and scene..and scene."

Ever get that feeling when a movie ends that you could’ve made a better ending?

It’s normal to have criticism after watching a blockbuster, indie, or any other sort of film, but there’s also watching a movie and expecting one ending, then getting another.

While it’s wonderful news to still be able to be surprised, it may not all be great.

Take for example Captain America. I won’t spoil you with the story of it due to the fact that I keep a reasonable amount of time reserved from movie release date time to not spoil any storyline. But in this case, I will refer to the video that ‘How It Should Have Ended’ made (somewhat spoiler alert!):

Doesn’t this remind you of how some films could’ve ended a lot better had the ending been closed off in a more sensible/believable manner?

I could go on and on about Stephen King films, but they’re adaptations of the book, so I’d be going after the source of the problem.

Personally most of the Indiana Jones films relied on one or two myerious forces, but for Indiana Jones & Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, aliens swirling around and killing the bad girl’s head.

The film Australia could’ve ended halfway. You know, before the second film started. Thinking about too many endings, when did you think the third Lord of the Rings film end?

What films come to mind that ended too abruptly, or made no sense, or even just plain upset you?


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The fountain of youth isn’t squeaky clean

Monday, September 5th, 2011

"I just want a little nibble..."

It may be that I’m trying to keep up to date with TV shows and am currently neck-deep (is that even a saying?) in True Blood, but there’s a little bit of news that has just caught my attention.

Stanford University, known for its upper-class persona and upper-lipped stiffness, has gone mythical. Not one to shy away from being pioneers of science breakthroughs, researchers have apparently found a way to slow the aging process in the brain (read the story here).

Though most of these experiments aren’t for human testing, hence the mice being used as test subjects, but apparently injecting an older mouse with young mice blood causes what is written as the “rejuvenation effect”, making more neurons, encouraging more activity across synapses, and less inflammation.

The opposite happens in reverse. While this sounds completely out of a film (which I bet the idea was originated from), I’m also shocked it hasn’t been tried before.

This is all too much considering the last week I’ve been spending playing Deus Ex: Human Revolution, and the concept ofaltering the human body. Not to mention that woman who injected horse blood into her several times. Could anyone be seeing this going all horribly wrong?

Kids! Don’t bite your older siblings!


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What? Will and Jada? Now if you’ll excuse me…

Wednesday, August 24th, 2011

What?

Donald Draper. He was nominated as most influential man by Time magazine (which sucked for the non-fictional people like Obama), and while he isn’t one to be dishing out relationship advice, he still gets shocked when something big breaks.

But even he can be at a loss for words. It was reported that Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith have gotten a divorce.

Don Draper, a man who has won the attention of ladies who will never have him (though Jon Hamm’s in luck), now has to compete with the recently-made single Will Smith. They had his reaction to the rumour here:

Alas, it was only prey to the rumours of the internet. Still, Don says “What?” a lot. In fact, there are a lot of cliche quotes in films that are used over and over again. So, here are Doogs’ Top Overused Classic Lines (click on the phrase to see the clip):

“It’s Showtime!”

“I’d tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.”

“Toto, I don’t think we’re in Kanzas anymore.”

Wilhelm Scream (you’ll recognise the most used sound effect)

“Get out of there!”

“Let’s get out of here!”

“It’s gonna blow!”

“Now if you’ll excuse me…”


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Neigh, do not try this at home

Monday, August 22nd, 2011

Mrs. Ed?

I went to see Captain America on the weekend. Late, I know, but I’ve been plowing through Mad Men and Community episodes for the last month (which I totally recommend you take up as your two new television projects).

It’s amazing how a film can inspire those few viewers who feel that some parts of a fantasy could actually be reality.

The first is a simple, straightforward attempt at a teenager who feels his Captain America-inspired (but not-so-inspired costume) shield can deflect an “artillery shell firework”.

The second is more concerning, but also makes me think how Charlie Sheen got his powers. In the name of art (which is a blanket to hide the ‘crazy’ in all of us), a French woman’s art project ‘May the Horse Live In Me’ involved injecting horse blood into her system.

This wasn’t a one-off kind of thing, as the human body isn’t made for this kind of interspecies blood transfusions (Keith Richards is different). She had to inject herself with “horse immunoglobulins and glycoproteins over several months”. You can read the rest of the story at WIRED (or wierd in this instance) here.

Apparently she was feeling superhuman (and a little bit horse), but I figure if you’re doing life-threatening procedures, and you survive, you’re more likely going “Holy sh** I’m not dead” all day.

I’d rather get shot at by fireworks, myself. Less work.


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The undead will bleed rainbows

Thursday, August 18th, 2011

She's cute and cutly.

Zombies don’t get enough love. First of all, having your body transformed into a rotting corpse that just won’t go away is no paradise for the confidence.

Secondly, everyone’s always afraid of you. “Oh no, don’t eat my brains” they say as you’re gnawing on their skulls. It’s not your fault. It’s in your unhuman nature.

I’ve given a zombie-themed post a week back about the importance of running away from the undead swarm. Running’s easy. Heck, it’s the first rule in Zombieland (Cardio). But who will give out the love that these monstrosities of Earth don’t seem to be getting any of?

The creative minds of a video game designer and a horror director have come up with a video game that combines a lot of cheek, and a lot of chunks.

Genius horror director James Gunn, well-known for his hilarious film Slither, as well as the similar-to-Kick-Ass-but-so-different Super, has teamed up with Suda 51, responsible for kick-ass games like No More Heroes and Killer7.

So what is this teamwork of horror, comedy and action?

Like a Buffy intro that makes you go “Well how is THAT a secret if everyone’s a zombie?”, this game looks to be something that will not make any sense, but at the same time will probably be extremely fun to play.

A cheerleader, it turns out, is as good at making zombies glitter and sparkle as a vampire’s daylight ‘power’. REMEMBER PEOPLE: SHE’S IN HIGH SCHOOL! Off-limits. Unless you’re a teenager, then by all means.


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I want what he’s eating on TV

Wednesday, August 10th, 2011

I'm a people person, myself.

How many shows and movies have you watched that made you start salivating? Beerfest comes to mind, but I’m talking about the products you see that you’ve always wondered “Man, I’d sure love one of those right now”.

I’ve only recently discovered a cracker unlike any other. Some say it’s made from high energy plankton, but I know the truth.

Sure, it’s just crackers with spinach and a hefty price tag, but man it’d be cool to chow down on one of these at film school. Freak out old people for eating Charlton Heston’s buddy, and freak out the kids eating anything green.

So I present to you:

Doogs’ Top 5 Favourite (and now real) Entertainmeals

1. Tru Blood (True Blood) - The sweet, sweet taste of O positive blood just sounds delightful…for a vampire. It’s possibly tomato juice with tobasco, but put a bit of liquor in it, and you’ve got yourself a drunk vamp (depending on the party, you’ll be sucking necks in no time).

2. Duff beer (The Simpsons) - If blood doesn’t settle your stomach, low-class suds’ll do the trick. There was always a wish inside to visit Duff Gardens. Though not sold in the US for copyright reasons, there’s a happy bunch of people living in Mexico glugging down the lovely bubbly.

3. Cheesy Poofs (South Park) - How Cartman got so fat was a result of dining. This dining came from green boxes of cheese-flavoured snacks that Eric couldn’t keep his hands off of. Hell yeah I want Cheesy Poofs!

4. Scooby Snacks (Scooby Doo) – I once ate dog buscuits when I was young. Heck, why lie about it, I ate them a few times. The dog just made them look like they tasted something amazing. So why not put together buscuits that would give supernatural confidence boosts? Though for more plausible confidence boosts, see (1) and (2) above.

5. Stay Puft marshmellows (Ghostbusters) – How awesome it would be to have a full-size marshmellow man? Pretty awesome, until, you know, you were finished gnawing on his toe and the rest of him got dirty and stale. Packs of marshmellows infused with caffeine will do the trick while you’re doing the Ghostbusters marathon.

But you know what, there are two foods that I’ve ALWAYS wanted to try, and they’re both from Seinfeld. Tell me which two foods I’m thinking about.


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Run to death

Monday, August 8th, 2011

"Flaaags....flaaaags.."

Oh, wow. Why didn’t I ever think about it before?

There is an event happening in Baltimore in the United States called ‘Run For Your Lives’. It’s a 5k run, with ‘obstacles’. Here’s the press release:

“Runners will navigate a series of 12 obstacles throughout a 5K course in an attempt to reach the finish line.”

Well, that’s simple enough, isn’t it? Here’s more:
“…with live entertainment and music, local celebrities, vendors, food, and of course, beer!”

It sounds like a run with obstacles. But what are the obstacles?

Zombies. The living dead that wants to eat your flesh. Or in this case, people who want to scare the living crap out of you while you attempt to run five kilometres. Your health is measured by flags, which those pesky zombies will be trying to nab while snarling at your heels and clawing for your brains.

This is both a film buff’s dream, and a film buff’s nightmare. How many zombie fans can you imagine running that kind of distance? I’m feeling out of breath already! But send a savage horde of zombies my way, I’ll bolt faster than my hipster shoes can handle.

Now I’m keen to watch Dawn of the Dead. See their website for more.


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